


뛰는 내 심장을 달래고

by dwaekki



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:07:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26589355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dwaekki/pseuds/dwaekki
Summary: Take a step forward. Breathe. Hold your lover's hand. Be a little braver.+ Hyunjin loves Jeongin, and Jeongin loves him right back. Isn't that all that matters?
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Yang Jeongin | I.N
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	뛰는 내 심장을 달래고

**Author's Note:**

> _baby tonight, a.c.e_

“You look nervous.”

For just one blissfully sweet second, the crowd of people surrounding Jeongin faded to the back of his mind. His thoughts crashed down from his heightened insecurity. He felt Hyunjin’s presence next to him — just a ghost of a touch, and yet, at the moment, it felt as if Hyunjin was holding him close, closer than he had when Jeongin had returned to him a month after he broke under pressure. It was a vivid memory for both of them: a letter left for Hyunjin, crinkled with tears: _I’m so sorry, I love you, I love you so much, but I just can’t do this_. Maybe, Jeongin thought, as Hyunjin welcomed him back without a second thought, as he begged and demanded, as a lover did, that Jeongin please, _please_ never leave him again; maybe Jeongin just needed Hyunjin’s comfort, after all. The prince’s comfort was that of faith; his touch, even a ghost of it, or the thought of it, made Jeongin brave.

It wasn’t enough for a real smile, but it was enough for a fake smile, and an ounce of truth in his words, “I’m okay.”

“Try again.”

“Fine.” Jeongin weighed his ounce of courage on Hyunjin’s hand, gripping it as the bustling crowd came back to the forefront of his mind — bliss gone, voice shaking, holding on too tight, “I’m nervous.”

“And I’m proud of you for admitting that to me.” Hyunjin said, bringing Jeongin’s hand to his mouth: a thank you disguised as a small kiss across his knuckles. The gesture meant a lot — both the act of Jeongin reaching for him, and Hyunjin’s bold kiss. Jeongin had promised, just before the masquerade, that he would hold Hyunjin’s hand, or initiate some other form of physical contact, if he grew too nervous; and Hyunjin, though with a mask covering his eyes, and casting a shadow over his mouth, was bold enough to kiss Jeongin with potential onlookers around. How wrong it was, for a prince like Hyunjin to lay his lips against another man. Those onlookers would be furious.

“You’ll get in trouble.” Jeongin tugged his hand away.

“People will judge me, yes. My parents will be disappointed.” Hyunjin pulled Jeongin to him, arm around hip, shoulders colliding — physical contact, so warm, yet so nerve-rattling. “But no consequence will come of it. I am still the prince. I will still be king, and you will be _my_ king.”

“Your people could hate you.” Jeongin said, his legs feeling numb as he and Hyunjin moved through the crowd. Jeongin has no idea where they were going; he hoped, wherever they stopped, there was water nearby. His throat hurt, and burned, weighted, embarrassed, by the hurtful truth, “They will hate _me_ , possibly exclusively. I will be the… the — oh, whatever names possible to refer to me as, who seduced and manipulated their prince.”

“Many will think of you in that way, yes.” Hyunjin admitted. He stopped. Jeongin stopped. No water nearby, just more people. Jeongin felt like he was suffocating. “But we know that is not true. I love you. In fact, I loved you _before_ you loved me. No seduction. No manipulation. Just me falling for a fellow prince.”

Hyunjin slowly reached to take off his mask. Jeongin’s hands rocketed forward out to stop him when he realized what Hyunjin was doing. He glanced frantically around — so many people were looking. So many of them must have recognized Hyunjin as the prince already, but, still, there was that deniability, the _you’re not certain that was the prince_ , so long as he kept his mask on. “Are you crazy?”

“Trust me.” Hyunjin said. Jeongin did, so he let go. Hyunjin removed his mask, and dropped it carelessly on the ground next to him. He stood tall, and confident, raising his arms in the perfect position for Jeongin to go to him. Jeongin did. Hyunjin’s left hand landed on his hip; his right hand lifted Jeongin’s into the air. His feet began to move, and Jeongin’s moved along. Jeongin was so conscious of the people looking, of the lights that fell over their shadows, but Jeongin kept his eyes on Hyunjin. They maintained eye contact as they danced to whatever slightly annoying music Hyunjin’s mother had chosen for the masquerade, and neither of them notably minded the crowd.

“Don’t be nervous, okay?” Hyunjin whispered, and, although the words cost him barely any breath, Jeongin detected a weight to them; his tone suggested he was asking for Jeongin’s permission — ?

— and it clicked.

Jeongin nodded, though he went temporarily numb with anxiety. Perhaps that is what allowed him to agree. Too late to change his mind. Did Jeongin really want to, anyhow? Hyunjin slowly stopped his movements, and he let go of Jeongin. People stared. Jeongin’s heart pounded. He stood, hands at his sides, and closed his eyes as Hyunjin’s hands came near his face. His mask slowly disconnected from his skin, and he heard, over the only sound in the room — the music — his mask drop to the ground. Jeongin opened his eyes again. He kept his gaze on Hyunjin, who was smiling. Jeongin could see the nerves ticking in his eyes, the fear that existed beneath the bravery. Jeongin smiled back.

“You,” Hyunjin mumbled, his lips barely moving as his touch surrounded Jeongin, left hand on hip again, right hand lifting Jeongin’s back into the air, “You are the love of my life.”

The two went back to slow dancing, feet trampling their masks. People continued to stare. People began to talk, whispers of judgement. Jeongin could almost hear the words, but not the truth of what they were saying: just his own mind imagining, scared of judgement, scared of tainting the royal family’s image. Some of the guests left, completely abandoning the party following Hyunjin and Jeongin’s bold confession. Jeongin saw Hyunjin’s parents come close to whisk them away, but Hyunjin had made his point. Hyunjin and Jeongin had said everything they needed to. Even as the two were reprimanded under the harsh gazes and words of Hyunjin’s parents, even as Hyunjin’s father ranted: “I allow you two to be in a relationship, but I did _not_ give you permission to out yourselves to our people,” Hyunjin and Jeongin held each other’s hands, and smiled at each other through their peripherals. Hyunjin’s parents were scared, not angry, and they both understood this. They didn’t find it particularly funny — what was funny about being judged simply for being in love? — but they felt empowered, and happy, and together. They had done that _together_ , no matter that it was Hyunjin’s particular bravery that initiated it. Jeongin’s bravery allowed it to happen.

**Author's Note:**

> [twitter](https://twitter.com/SE0SUNN) ♡

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Much More a Lover than a Fighter](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26688970) by [Gliese1214b](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gliese1214b/pseuds/Gliese1214b)




End file.
